Today of all days, I decided not to dive into my creative side, and yet write an actual journal entry.
It was a rather painful day, One I hate living through but would never wish it on anyone else.
Ive decided the best way to explain it would be to go into detail, every... inch.
Just.. imagine....
Your toes are numb, like they are sleep. They do not tingle, they do not hurt, they are just numb. It moves up to your ankles, your calves.. The numbness turning to a tingle, a pain. up to your hips, your back.
Every step is painful, shooting a sudden shock through your spine with every step. Your arms are weak, picking up a simple thing is difficult. You have to handle everything with care, fear that you may drop it. Your head hurts, but not a headache, a more settle pain.. non stop. Your arms, feel as though you have been working out for days non stop.
No one could understand what it is like, unless you live through it.
Needing to hold on to the wall to walk, watching every step, afraid your going to fall. Afraid you wont feel the ground beneath you.
Its so hard, to take a breath and not feel as though your chest is going to cave in, to walk down the hall and feel your heart pounding so hard, as though its going to just break out of your chest.
I know one day I wont be able to take a step, to hold a hand, to lift a camera.
My life would end...... I would be a puppet in the arms of another.
Good days.. and Bad days.. today is the bad.
But I smile... for what else can I do?
Feeling sorry for myself, will do nothing.. you feeling sorry for me.. will do nothing...
I smile,..... for I know that nothing can be done, and tomorrow is a new day.
This.. is my life.. and today of all days.. was a bad day.
